2 Corinthians 2:1-4

So I made up my mind that I would not make another painful visit to you. 2 For if I grieve you, who is left to make me glad but you whom I have grieved? 3 I wrote as I did, so that when I came I would not be distressed by those who should have made me rejoice. I had confidence in all of you, that you would all share my joy. 4 For I wrote you out of great distress and anguish of heart and with many tears, not to grieve you but to let you know the depth of my love for you. -2 Corinthians 2:1-4

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Love speaks the truth even when it hurts.  You can sense in these words that there’s an awkwardness between the Apostle Paul and the Christians in the church of Corinth.  Paul was pretty harsh with his rebuke of them when they ignored one of their own members committing a grave sexual sin—the man was sleeping around with his step-mom.

First, before you speak the truth in love, you must first evaluate your own heart.  You must pray and be certain that your motivations are to help the individual and not just to condemn them for revenge or your own ego depending on the situation.  Truth can be wielded as a weapon in the wrong hands and used to destroy and wound.  In the right hands, truth is healing salve that stings on the wound, but ultimately restores the person.

Second, before you speak the truth, you need to evaluate your relationship with the individual.  Have you earned the right to be heard in their lives?  Have you invested enough into this friendship where now your words have weight?  Are you the right person to speak this truth to this individual?

If your motivations are right and you have earned the right to heard in this person’s life, then out of love, you must speak the truth.  You must accept that however gentle you present this harsh truth, there will be wounds.  There ought to be wounds because you are helping to destroy an old way of thinking and hoping your friend will rebuild his or her mind to a new way of thinking.

Think of a time someone spoke a painful truth that you needed to hear and it was so helpful.  Now think of a time you did that for someone else.

Love speaks the truth even when it hurts.